those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
