I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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