thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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