I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
