Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
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