my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
