And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
