So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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