Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
