He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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