I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
