Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
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