butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Randomize
