I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize
