it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
