if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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