I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Randomize
