so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
