thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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