Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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