he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
