: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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