im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
