note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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