dude i'm inner monologue high
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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