it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
