Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Randomize
