we're blogging at a bar
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
