Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
