i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
