I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
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