We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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