I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
whose parrot is this?
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
