Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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