god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Randomize
