Will you blow on my dice?
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I just want nice things and good sex
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
