If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
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