he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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