Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
