Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
