Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
