His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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