People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
