I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
