just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
The adults are the big ones right?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
