I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
