We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize