SEEEEXXX PLEASE
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
