Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
She's just so happy...and so naked.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
