Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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